Friday, March 9, 2012

Pride. The good kind.

"Be true to yourself" is one of the phrases I say to myself daily.  Along with the Ghandi quote, "Be the change you want to see in the world." 
Photo from Rawarletterpress on Etsy
Don't just try to be true to yourself, but also be true the person you want to be.  Be honest with yourself.  We all make mistakes, NOT one person is perfect, however shouldn't we be striving every moment of every day to be working toward that perfection?  Toward that person we want to be?

Am I wrong to think this is NOT too much to ask of people?  Be true to what you claim to be.  Be true to the things you say.  Be true to your beliefs.  Before you make a decision ask, is this decision in support of the person I claim to be?  

I am prepared to be blasted for this post.  So if you disagree with me, that's ok.  I am no longer going to sit on the side lines and watch blog posts full of people using excuses with pride as an attempt to validate choices that do not line up with their stated beliefs.  This has become a pet peeve of mine, especially when these posts become viral.  I am most definitely NOT a fan of giant online excuse parties.  

Recently another one of these posts came up.  Then at the bottom of the post there was a link up!  A LINK up for an excuse party.  Really?  

Any sentence that goes like this: "I am a [insert adjective here] BUT...." Right there, that word, the word, "but", just makes me want to jump out of my skin and scream!  It's just like a person who purposely cuts you and then says, "I'm sorry I hurt you, but I really wanted to." That's not an apology, it's an excuse.  An attempt to validate a poor choice. 

It's like a vegan who goes to McDonald's.  Umm, what?  It just doesn't make sense. If you have stated that you are a vegan for health reasons, you shouldn't be eating ANYTHING at McDonald's.  If you have stated that you are a vegan for animal rights reasons, then you really shouldn't be going near a McDonald's.  So, if you tell me you are a vegan and I see you eating at a McDonald's, I am not going to respect you or your opinions. 

I think the reason this all bothers me is because it seems to me to show a lack of pride.  A lack of the GOOD kind of pride.  Like, pride in one's work.  Or the pride that brings about self-respect and gains you respect from others.  

It's hard to be true to your ideals, especially in a world of convenience and excuses.  Hard, but not impossible. Everyday we are faced with choices. The choices we make can bring us closer to our ideals, closer to the person we want to be OR they can bring us down.  Make us feel like we have to defend ourselves, and validate ourselves with excuses.

I want to surround my self with people who have pride.  I desperately want to see people able to respect themselves and others.  I want my son to grow up with pride in who he is and proud of where he comes from.  

So, I propose a link up where we build this pride.  Let's show all these excuse makers what pride is and how to make it happen.  A link up where we say, I had the chance to do such and such, but I did not, and it felt freakin fantastic!  I want to see so many positive uses of the word BUT that the word stops being my pet-peeve!

I will start:

       Some days I feel like I just don't have the patience to deal with my three year old.  Today, after building two different train tracks for him and being told that they weren't "right", I wanted to put all of the train tracks away. Instead I calmly sat down with my son and asked him what kind of train tracks would be right.  Then we built the tracks together.  This is the kind of mom I want to be every day!
      Recently, I was very hungry, had some extra cash, was in my car and driving by a Starbucks.  I wanted a coffee and some coffee cake.  In our house we eat locally grown organic food (veggies, fruits, meat, dairy, etc.) as much as possible and otherwise only organic.  I knew that I would be home in 15 minutes and instead of pulling through the drive through, I stuck to our family's commitment.  I did NOT go to Starbucks!  Yay!  Instead, I went home, made my own coffee and had some cheese and an apple.
      There were piles and piles of dishes in my kitchen this morning.  I wanted to sleep in and pretend they did not exist, but I got up and immediately washed them ALL!  
      I had a difficult alteration to work on for a friend.  Although I could have cheated on the alteration and most likely no one would have been the wiser, I chose to go through the hassle of doing the alteration correctly.   I am proud knowing that the dress I took in will look great and was done professionally, by me.  No hack jobs!
      This morning, when I used the bathroom, the roll was looking thin.  I though, maybe I can just leave the few squares on there and someone else will change it!  But, I know I would have been annoyed if someone else had done that to me, so I took the extra 30 seconds and changed the roll! :)
      My sister's birthday just passed.  About a month ago, I thought, eh, her birthday is coming up, I can just get something from Amazon last minute and have it shipped right to her.  But instead I took the time to find a few unique handmade gifts on Etsy.

I am sure there are more and I will be able to come up with some throughout the next week.  So let's have a self-respect, pride party today and every Friday. What a great way to start the weekend!  

Make your own positive blog post and then link up here at the bottom (this is my first time hosting a link party, so if it doesn't work, let me know and I will fix it!) 


Donna Becker said...

I don't have an active blog, so I can't take advantage of the linky thing. Instead, I'll just leave a note cheering for you!
Here's my entry --
Being disabled, I spend quite a bit of time at home alone while my DH is at work. In the past, I've regularly gone out to eat for lunch, partly because it allows me to be around people (even if I go through a drive-through).
With my disability also came a decrease in our income. We've recently adopted a very tight budget. So my lunches out were contributing to a drain on our finances.
Today, I really wanted to get lunch out because I wanted some variety in what I've been eating and wanted to be around people.
But I chose instead to spend a little time talking with a new neighbor and then got a Cliff Bar (carrot cake) and a diet soda here at home. Feels better all the way around!
Thanks for the topic ... and the encouragement! said...

Thank you a lot for this post. It made me inspired for doing more. I know I'm quite talented to do lot's of things, though sometimes I just don't want to. I have to inspire myself more

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